i've had a rough go at it, the past couple of days. the stomach's been a mess... the sleep has been non-existent. then today, at the end of a training session, one of my regulars asked me a question. no doubt it was because i was staring into space. "where are you?" "huh?", i responded, trying desperately to remember what we were just talking about. "you're not yourself today." i apologized to her and told her that i had some things on my mind. "i could tell that you weren't here today." i told her that she was astute. i literally said the word "astute". and without even asking what was wrong, she offered the following... "you know, god has a plan... you may not like it, but everything happens for a reason... and everything is going to be okay." if i wasn't surrounded by customers and co-workers... something bad would've happened, but i kept my composure. i told her thanks and she gave me a little pat o...
wow. i haven't read my work in a long time... almost three years since my last post. it's amazing the amount of self-reflection that can occur when you take a glimpse of the past you left behind. three years can really change a man. now married, and now a father, i'm more hesitant to use the word "fuck" or and derivative thereof, so freely. i don't smoke anymore and rarely is alcohol even considered. no more clubs and nights until 5am... ...and the best part? i'm as happy as can be! confident in my life, proud of my family, eager as ever to experience everything life has in store. i'm closer to God and i'm getting the big picture. am i ready to start blogging again? i don't know. i realize now, how much i used this as my outlet. my therapy. if just one person would read my words and comment on how they "get it"... well what a relief. its like being alone but not feeling alone. but i'm not there anymore. so can i write the "ha...
i spent all day debating whether or not to break the cardinal rule of blogging. well actually, there are two cardinal rules to blogging (at least in my book of the cardinal rules of blogging). one : don't talk about other people's shit, unless you get express, written or verbal consent . and two : don't talk about women you are together with, dating, or otherwise interested in . anyways, i was debating on whether or not to break the second rule... and i've decided that i can't do it. what i will tell you is that i went on a " date " with ariel (read the second part of this post and the second part of this post to get caught up.) and it was great. why is date in quotes? again, i can't break the rule. not this time. but i will tell that she's beautiful, smart, sweet, outgoing, and she has this sense of humor that is so endearing, i can't really explain. she has this really subtle sarcasm that is so perfect, i have wait for her to finish a s...
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