wow. i haven't read my work in a long time... almost three years since my last post. it's amazing the amount of self-reflection that can occur when you take a glimpse of the past you left behind. three years can really change a man. now married, and now a father, i'm more hesitant to use the word "fuck" or and derivative thereof, so freely. i don't smoke anymore and rarely is alcohol even considered. no more clubs and nights until 5am... ...and the best part? i'm as happy as can be! confident in my life, proud of my family, eager as ever to experience everything life has in store. i'm closer to God and i'm getting the big picture. am i ready to start blogging again? i don't know. i realize now, how much i used this as my outlet. my therapy. if just one person would read my words and comment on how they "get it"... well what a relief. its like being alone but not feeling alone. but i'm not there anymore. so can i write the "ha...
i've had a rough go at it, the past couple of days. the stomach's been a mess... the sleep has been non-existent. then today, at the end of a training session, one of my regulars asked me a question. no doubt it was because i was staring into space. "where are you?" "huh?", i responded, trying desperately to remember what we were just talking about. "you're not yourself today." i apologized to her and told her that i had some things on my mind. "i could tell that you weren't here today." i told her that she was astute. i literally said the word "astute". and without even asking what was wrong, she offered the following... "you know, god has a plan... you may not like it, but everything happens for a reason... and everything is going to be okay." if i wasn't surrounded by customers and co-workers... something bad would've happened, but i kept my composure. i told her thanks and she gave me a little pat o...
this blog is for bean . hey bean, please do not read this unless you are high. so robyn sends me this link, and i think it's absolutely bizarre . it's a video clip of this prison in my homeland, the philippines . she titled the email something like " what inmates do in filipino jails... this is for real ", and i'm thinking that i'm about to watch some brutal massacre of violence and torture... but this is what it was instead... as seen on youtube . holy shit. i want to know how they picked the inmate to play the girl . and like with all youtube viewings, i scanned the "related videos" to see what other sorts of nonsense they had done, and lo and behold... they've done the algorithm march ! algorithm march i came across this clip about six months ago, but i never got the chance to forward it on. i'm not gonna explain shit, because when i first watched it, it was just out of sheer curiosity of the title. before i toss you the link, here are te...
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