she's in my head. the problem is, i know i'll never get her. and maybe that's really just my deep rooted low self esteem talking, but i'm not so sure anymore.

i've been fucking around too long and now i've slacked myself out of contention. someone else gets to hold her hand. someone else gets to write her lovely letters. watch tv and just couch all day.

i'm burned out and wasted. just another genius with nothing to show for it. so much to give, but no one to share with.



shite.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

giving thanks

last year, erin and i spent thanksgiving at cammie's place in the city. it was an intimate gathering of cam's close friends. i made some baked mac and cheese that i was very proud of... it was delicious. but betsy broke my casserole dish on purpose, because she had her own mac and cheese she wanted everyone to eat. just kidding, but i dish really did break, and it really was betsy's doing... accidentally, on purpose. heh. anyways, this is the first thanksgiving in 5 years, that i haven't spent with erin. very strange, and sad too. i've found myself reflecting on the friendships that i've made over the past couple of years... thinking about the people who come into and out of our lives so quickly. as you may be able to tell, i'm a nostalgic little fuck. i live every day like it's a big event. i try to treat those i've just met, like they're my best friend (unless they're a complete douche bag). i get sad at the end of the night when i have
Read more

speculation

last night was a reunion dinner of sorts. i hadn't seen danielle s. (not express danielle from yesterday, who will henceforth be known as the notorious dani g. ) or mel since the wedding of jim and phuc . and since danny has been seeing danielle, it has truly been a long time. to complete the circle was al and you know that with this group, things are liable to get a little out of control... and they did. because with this group, despite low levels of alcoholic consumption, the conversation will inevitably lead to sex . and i don't mean interesting, funny, anecdotes about sex... i mean absolutely raunchy, graphic, illegal, "i'm going to hell" sex talk. and again, this is with like 2 drinks each. no shots of patr&#243n tonight. just a bunch of explicit conversation that has, in the past, caused eavesdroppers in the vicinity to leave the immediate area, out of distaste. we may have talked about movies for a little while, but i don't remember it much.
Read more
what a fucking night. sox game so we started by taking the el to the sox game. it was dan, dave, chuck, and me. we got there at the top of the 4th, with the sox up 5 to 1, not that i give a shit about the sox or baseball for that matter. we met up with the crew, which was a good 25 or so guys. tauber's dad was there and he was hilarious. there was a fight in the stands and we all cheered. there were also many hotties walking around, prompting us to immediately decide to come to another sox game soon. yay. griffin's we took a very interesting el ride to get to the bar. dan and i were being very obnoxious. it was great. legerro got off the train a couple of stops early so that he could piss. haha! jon got us open bar from 10p-1am. we got hammered pretty fast. then the first stipper came and she was pretty good. she was actually serving drinks for everyone completely naked. she gave a couple of lap dances. she was great. then dallas showed up and she rocked the house. she was gor
Read more